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Clean up copy on new hire day one page

Ryan requested to merge vidkun/www-gitlab-com:vidkun/new_hire_copy_edit into master

Cleans up general grammar, punctuation, extraneous words on the New Hire Day One page.

Changes:

  • 'with' to 'within'
  • 'Note- ' to 'Note: '
  • Adds period to end of sentence
  • Deletes extra 'with'

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