[#105] Apply correct formatting to dialogues

and minor proofreading corrections
parent 653f424b
......@@ -56,9 +56,9 @@ And then, suddenly, red.
Son of a bitch, it's a damn rat!
A pest, not a kid!
As for the office, they know there's a smoking spot!
The cigarette break takes place here, nowhere else!
The cigarette break takes place here, nowhere else!"
--- You uttered an insult.
"You uttered an insult.
Your offense was registered as an aggravating circumstance.
Please show your identification tattoo.
Any repetition of this request will be registered as a refusal to comply."
......@@ -78,11 +78,11 @@ It's replaying the recording in its metallic head.
"Negative.
The recording is clear.
Both pronunciation and intention were explicit.
Both pronunciation and intention were explicit."
--- But please! No kid was there to hear ...
"But please! No kid was there to hear ..."
--- Psychological analysis indicates an 86.63% probability that this circumstance was irrelevant to your behavior."
"Psychological analysis indicates an 86.63% probability that this circumstance was irrelevant to your behavior."
Ok.
I'm done.
......@@ -93,9 +93,9 @@ All this work, just to finish there ...
I just performed a dangerous precision operation.
I spent five hours aligning the heads of an injector in a cold fusion reactor, without pausing.
I'm sure you know how trying this is.
I beg the indulgence of the police for the offenses and for my short temper.
I beg the indulgence of the police for the offenses and for my short temper."
--- The indulgence is refused.
"The indulgence is refused.
The aggravated offense has been recorded.
Please report to the police station of your choice before the end of the day.
The sanction will be pronounced then."
......
......@@ -15,116 +15,116 @@ challenge:
- type: theme
constraint: cultural difference
- type: general
constraint: Write only dialogue, do not include parenthical elements
constraint: Write only dialogue, do not include narrative elements or speech tags
personal: true
---
--- Oh, dammit! My poor head ...
"Oh, dammit! My poor head ..."
--- Oh, hey, you're awake!
"Oh, hey, you're awake!
Take it easy, that was quite a fall.
Are you hurt?
Are you hurt?"
--- My knee and head ache.
Ok, a nice bump on the top ...
"My knee and head ache.
Ok, a nice bump on the top ..."
--- Though no blood when I checked.
"Though no blood when I checked."
--- Indeed.
"Indeed.
And down ... Ouch ...
Feels like a sprain.
I'll cobble a splint together.
How long was I out?
How long was I out?"
--- Not that long.
"Not that long.
Barely five minutes, actually.
Here, this bar should be strong enough to brace your leg.
Here, this bar should be strong enough to brace your leg."
--- Thanks.
What happened to us exactly?
"Thanks.
What happened to us exactly?"
--- We thought we were walking on dirt, but that dirt was on top of a vast underground complex.
"We thought we were walking on dirt, but that dirt was on top of a vast underground complex.
A ceiling gave out and we went through.
From what I could see and here, I think the structure was abandoned a while ago.
From what I could see and here, I think the structure was abandoned a while ago."
--- Great! No injury on your side?
"Great! No injury on your side?"
--- Some bruises, but I'll recover.
"Some bruises, but I'll recover.
We need to find a way out of here.
Our entry point is out of reach.
Our entry point is out of reach."
--- Ouch!
"Ouch!
Well, that should do.
You said the complex is va ...
Oh, yeah, the view is dizzying.
Have you seen any way off this ... well, this walkway?
Have you seen any way off this ... well, this walkway?"
--- Three doors on this floor.
"Three doors on this floor.
The black one is not to be considered.
The bridge is rickety on this side and probably wouldn't take my weight.
The bridge is rickety on this side and probably wouldn't take my weight."
--- And mine even less when I'd ask you to help me through ...
"And mine even less when I'd ask you to help me through ..."
--- Sooooo we must choose between a what-must-have-been-bright-red door and a faded crimson one.
"Sooooo we must choose between a what-must-have-been-bright-red door and a faded crimson one.
It's funny.
Metal and leather seem to have been fashionable when this complex was built.
The architecture is something between the European industrial revolution and the steampunk fantasy universe, with touches reminiscent of the Russian military base of the Cold War ...
The architecture is something between the European industrial revolution and the steampunk fantasy universe, with touches reminiscent of the Russian military base of the Cold War ..."
--- Please, let's stop here the architecture lesson ...
"Please, let's stop here the architecture lesson ..."
--- Right, sorry for digressing ...
"Right, sorry for digressing ..."
--- ... and let's look for a way out of here.
Open the brown door!
"... and let's look for a way out of here.
Open the brown door!"
--- Didn't I know you, I wouldn't fathom how fast you fall back into your habits at the slightest annoyance!
"Didn't I know you, I wouldn't fathom how fast you fall back into your habits at the slightest annoyance!
I like to be of service to my fellowmen, but I don't have to obey your orders.
I'm no military and you know that!
Well, let's see ...
By the way, why this door rather than the other one?
By the way, why this door rather than the other one?"
--- Well, it seems obvious.
The other one is red, and red means danger.
"Well, it seems obvious.
The other one is red, and red means danger."
--- What do you mean, "red means danger?"
"What do you mean, 'red means danger?'
We don't know anything about that!
We don't know anything about the culture of this planet's inhabitants!
We don't know anything about the culture of this planet's inhabitants!"
--- We know they're humanoids, and their blood is red.
Pouring blood is a bad sign, so red is a bad sign too, right?
"We know they're humanoids, and their blood is red.
Pouring blood is a bad sign, so red is a bad sign too, right?"
--- Haven't you learned anything from me yet?
"Haven't you learned anything from me yet?"
--- It seems not, seeing how you react.
"It seems not, seeing how you react."
--- Red is blood, yes.
"Red is blood, yes.
But some cultures venerate it as a life force!
In that sense, the door that looked like coagulated blood looks more jeopardizing.
In that sense, the door that looked like coagulated blood looks more jeopardizing."
--- Ok, your arguments are legit ...
"Ok, your arguments are legit ..."
--- Each culture has its own references and interpretations, just like you and me don't look at something through the same filters, because we did not have the same experiences ...
"Each culture has its own references and interpretations, just like you and me don't look at something through the same filters, because we did not have the same experiences ..."
--- ... We've had some in common, by now ...
"... We've had some in common, by now ..."
--- ... It's something people tend to forget and, as a consequence, you only see things as you're used to; you can't see like others see it.
For instance, do you know why, when the globalization was the purpose of all great companies, some Western hypermarkets almost failed their implantation in China?
"... It's something people tend to forget and, as a consequence, you only see things as you're used to; you can't see like others see it.
For instance, do you know why, when the globalization was the purpose of all great companies, some Western hypermarkets almost failed their implantation in China?"
--- Because they were the wrong color?
"Because they were the wrong color?"
--- Make fun of it if you like, but it's just that!
"Make fun of it if you like, but it's just that!
Our nice, pure white was the color of mourning in China.
Clients only came after local decorators installed red decorations all over.
Clients only came after local decorators installed red decorations all over."
--- Ah. And what was red to the Chinese?
"Ah. And what was red to the Chinese?"
--- It was a color for celebration.
"It was a color for celebration.
It was related to the sun.
And, as for the third door, black could be a symbol of strength as well as one of disaster.
And, as for the third door, black could be a symbol of strength as well as one of disaster."
--- Ok.
So, according to you, we should forget about this door and focus on the other one?
"Ok.
So, according to you, we should forget about this door and focus on the other one?"
--- ... No, not necessarily.
"... No, not necessarily.
Just don't use the color as the sole criterion to choose.
Actually, let's not take it into account at all and be extra careful when opening it.
Actually, let's not take it into account at all and be extra careful when opening it."
......@@ -31,11 +31,9 @@ I may have spoken too fast.
One soldier stares at me as I walk by them.
I keep going, my silly smile nailed to my face, when I hear a voice behind me.
--- Excuse me, sir. May I inspect your bag, please?
"Excuse me, sir. May I inspect your bag, please?"
I turn to face the patrol, grabbing my bag in order to open it and present it to the man who spoke to me.
--- Of course, sir.
I turn to face the patrol, grabbing my bag in order to open it and present it to the man who spoke to me. "Of course, sir."
Keeping his right hand on his unloaded machine gun all the while, he discards a notebook and the laptop to see the pens and other gizmos at the bottom of the bag before letting it go.
I can see to his sour look that he hoped for something else.
......@@ -43,23 +41,23 @@ His left hand falls back to the side of his body as his eyes refocus on mine.
There is a question on his mind.
Most certainly whether or not I'm mocking him.
--- You can go, sir.
Sorry for the bother.
"You can go, sir.
Sorry for the bother."
--- Thank you, sir.
Um, sir? I asked tentatively as he turns back.
"Thank you, sir.
Um, sir?" I asked tentatively as he turns back.
He looks back at me.
--- I suppose you wondered why I was smiling?
"I suppose you wondered why I was smiling?"
He looks like kid caught with his hand in the cookie jar.
--- Er ... Yeah, a little.
"Er ... Yeah, a little."
--- I wasn't making fun of you, if that is any reassurance.
"I wasn't making fun of you, if that is any reassurance.
On the contrary.
I always admire professional know-how, whether it's the art of a master craftsman or a soldier moving with discipline and efficiency.
What's more, you spend your life ensuring our safety.
A small smile is the least of the thanks we can give you.
Have a good day!
Have a good day!"
......@@ -27,29 +27,27 @@ As she's slowly turning her head to her right, her eyes focus on the door.
Her arm rises as in a dream, her hand stretching out towards the handle without reaching it.
Her left foot moves forward, almost stumbling, when a voice comes from the living room, behind her.
--- Cathy? Where are you?
OH GOD NO, DON'T DO THAT!
"Cathy? Where are you?
OH GOD NO, DON'T DO THAT!"
Frank's scream brings the young woman to her senses.
She turns and looks at him, her eyes still misty from the torpor she was in, as if she were waking up from a deep sleep.
Her elocution seems to go with this hypothesis.
Le cri de Frank sort la jeune femme de sa torpeur.
--- Wazgunnon?
"Wazgunnon?"
--- You almost opened that damn door, that's what's going on!
"You almost opened that damn door, that's what's going on!"
--- What?! Uh, sorry. I don't know what came over me.
"What?! Uh, sorry. I don't know what came over me."
The man calms down a bit and looks at her almost tenderly.
"You look like a sleepwalker.
You should get some sleep."
--- You look like a sleepwalker.
You should get some sleep.
--- You're right, I feel drained.
Cathy goes to the stairs and each step up seems more tiring than the previous one.
"You're right, I feel drained." Cathy goes to the stairs and each step up seems more tiring than the previous one.
She really doesn't feel well.
She passes the little window that normally opens on the outside.
Normally.
Like all the other windows, it's barricaded.
......@@ -95,50 +93,42 @@ Memories fade, thoughts and the room follow, and Cathy sinks into sleep.
She wakes up with a start and opens her eyes.
In front of her, the ceiling and Frank's face, bent over her.
--- What's going on? Is Nelly home?
"What's going on?" she asks. "Is Nelly home?"
Frank scowls and answers:
Frank scowls and answers, "No, still no news."
--- No, still no news.
Cathy straightens herself up somehow before continuing.
--- I need some air.
I'll go get her.
Cathy straightens herself up somehow before continuing,
"I need some air.
I'll go get her."
Frank's eyes suddenly look like saucers.
--- You're not serious, are you?
"You're not serious, are you?
Don't you dare thinking about it!
Do I need to remind you how chaotic it is out there?
Do I need to remind you how chaotic it is out there?"
--- What do we know about it?
We've been cooped up in here for a week and know nothing about what's going on out there!
"What do we know about it?
We've been cooped up in here for a week and know nothing about what's going on out there!"
--- And we're safe!
Look: Nelly wanted to get out and she never came back!
--- There's probably nothing dramatic.
She only left...
"And we're safe!
Look: Nelly wanted to get out and she never came back!"
"There's probably nothing dramatic.
She only left..."
Cathy looks at her watch.
She still feels muddy when attempting some mental calculation.
--- Five o'clock. If I leave now, I have a chance of finding her before dark.
"Five o'clock. If I leave now, I have a chance of finding her before dark."
Frank's voice is getting stronger, and the tone he's using sounds less and less like worry and more and more like anger.
--- Stay here, it's the only place you're safe!
There's nothing but sickness and madness out there!
"Stay here, it's the only place you're safe!
There's nothing but sickness and madness out there!"
The vehemence of the man facing him awakens another, closer memory.
A memory five hours old.
While she was in the bedroom, she heard the voices of Nelly and Frank rising from the bottom of the stairs.
They had become more and more violent, until there was a slamming door sound, followed by the sound of something falling.
Cathy had come mid-stairs to ask if everything was all right.
Leaning on the banister, she had seen the coat rack in the vestibule on the floor and Frank walking back and forth between the front door and the one leading to the cellar.
When Cathy asked him, he raised a closed face and said:
--- She absolutely insisted on going out to check what's up, no matter what I thought.
When Cathy asked him, he had raised a closed face and said, "She absolutely insisted on going out to check what's up, no matter what I thought."
Then he had gone down to the cellar and slammed the door behind him.
......@@ -54,9 +54,8 @@ And yet we're struggling.
His brain is split in two.
One half still hasn't gotten off the point he was analyzing when he left his desk, the other half is listening as carefully as it can with the scarce resources that are still available.
The project manager is explaining the technical bottlenecks they encountered and the measures that he, the architect, has suggested.
The sales manager acknowledges and then turns to him to ask:
--- And do you think we could have done any better?
The sales manager acknowledges and then turns to him and asks,
"And do you think we could have done any better?"
He is taken aback.
This morning's problem is instantly forgotten as he opens his mouth to answer, ready to be scathing in his answer.
......
......@@ -102,17 +102,17 @@ And finally, there's the alarm bell.
I've never heard much of her.
As you may've guessed, it rings when...
--- Ringer! Bell-ringer! Are you up there?
"Ringer! Bell-ringer! Are you up there?"
I'm being called.
I need to go down quickly.
--- Aymeric! I'm here.
What's going on?
"Aymeric! I'm here.
What's going on?"
--- Sails have been sighted at sea.
"Sails have been sighted at sea.
We fear they are invaders.
The burgomaster asks that the tocsin be rung!
The burgomaster asks that the tocsin be rung!"
Very well, here's my chance to hear the sound of our alarm bell, with redoubled blows!
At work, the tocsin won't ring by itself.
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